The struggle with depression and anxiety has been a life long one for me. Most people don't know that, and those who find out are usually surprised. I'm a pretty happy go lucky kind of girl...I smile and giggle a lot. I stay very busy and do a lot of things. I always have. But I have to work very hard to keep my head above water. I have been on medications at various times in my life...but not for the last 3 or 4 years. I'm usually able to stay afloat by eating the right foods, getting a lot of sleep, staying active, and constantly working on a good attitude.
Sometimes life pushes me a little under the water, and I have to struggle back up to the top, usually I'm pretty good at bouncing back up. Some how there were just a few too many dunks recently, and I'm struggling to catch my breath. Consequently I'm having trouble focusing, I have little motivation or creativity, I'm rather grumpy, often tearful, super tired, overly sensitive, scatterbrained ....you get the idea.
Why am I writing this on my blog? Well, because it's real...it's me, and it's not a secret. Instead of hiding it and being ashamed. I've decided to name it, accept it, and work on overcoming it...one day at a time.
Writing this blog helps me to focus on all the wonderful and blessed parts of my life. It highlights the high points, and brings me so much joy. So I'm going to try to get working on that again. But first I thought I should just admit to myself and to this record....that there are also low points. Our obsession with perfection, and inability to achieve it, causes most of our stress. So, here's to admitting that my life is not perfect and never will be...and now it's time to move on and enjoy the wonderful life I have.
I was wondering why there weren't any new posts. I hope you are doing better. We all love you so much! It's so fun to see what the kids are up to. Thayne and I were bummed that we didn't get to see you during the summer. Hopefully you all had fun and things are getting back to normal. Can't wait to see more pics!
ReplyDeleteHey, Michelle,
ReplyDeleteYou're in good company. We know where you're coming from.
Just found your awesome blog. It's been fun catching up. Hope you're having a blast today. If you'd like to see what's happening in our neck of the woods, I keep a little blog as well.